What Stands in the Way...

Here is something that bugs me:

I go outside to mow the lawn, but the lawnmower won’t start because it is out of gas. So, I look for the gas can in the shed and find it in the back corner. I have to take three bikes out of the shed because they are blocking my path to the can. I finally get to the back and grab it, just to realize it is empty. This means I have to go to the gas station. The gas station is right next to the store, so I might as well pack a cooling bag so I can buy a few essentials for the fridge while I’m there.

All I wanted to do was mow the lawn!

And yet somehow it turned into an odyssey of tasks that must be completed before I can actually cut the grass.

I’m sure I am not the only one who gets frustrated by tasks that open up an infinite number of side quests which must be completed first.

At times, these “side quests” make life feel like an ill-fated hike: You see a bench in the distance and think it would be a beautiful place to enjoy the sunset. Once you start hiking, you are met by piranha-filled rivers, scorching deserts, snowy mountain peaks, famine, and drought … and all you wanted to do was sit on that bench.

How can we deal with these obstacles so that they do not frustrate or dishearten us?

I think a shift in mindset is necessary.

Marcus Aurelius writes, “What stands in the way, becomes the way.”

...The obstacle is the path.

An empty gas can is not simply an annoyance. It is an obstacle, and so it becomes my new task.

A fender-bender is not only an annoyance but an obstacle that must be overcome.

Marcus Aurelius teaches us with this line that if a metaphorical bridge collapses, it creates an obstacle. This obstacle, in turn, guides us down a new path in which we must repair the bridge before crossing over it.

It gets deeper than this, though.

What is an all-too-common response to inconveniences?

Frustration, anger, impatience.

Things did not go as we expected, so we get upset because now we have to deal with something we had not planned for.

The new task at hand then becomes not only embracing the problem but, more importantly, controlling one's response to the situation.

If I get frustrated because I have to complete task after task before mowing the lawn, the single most important obstacle that must be overcome is the upset within me.

If anger takes control of me because my co-workers are not cooperating with my plans, my priority is no longer to get them on board. My mission has become controlling my anger, for that is what now stands in my way.

And if I lose my patience because I’ve been waiting forever at the doctor's office, my obstacle is not that they won’t see me in a timely manner … it is that I am impatient and frustrated. And so my annoyance must be dealt with first.

Obstacles pop up everywhere.

What stands in the way must become the way. We must address the obstacles that arise with focused time and energy – especially when the obstacle is within us.

Life is unpredictable; our response to it should not be.